Features, Top Ten

Top Ten List of Things We’re Sick Of Currently

0 Comments 22 March 2013


Like you, we here at The Shade spend a disproportionate amount of our time thinking about how much stuff pisses us off. It adds depth and meaning to our existence. As the venerable Sigmund Freud once said “One feels inclined to say that the intention that man should be happy is not included in the plan of Creation. So wipe that puss off your face and fill my cocaine jar chop chop!”

As a token of our solidarity in wading through a pool of communal suffering we wanted to share with you the Top 10 Things That We’re Sick Of Currently. Perhaps we can give you some new things to gripe about but at the very least – hopefully – this can be another addition to your current list.

10. The Weather – especially business calls with people who insist on starting the conversation by discussing the different weather outside their fucking window at this time. And please stop complaining that its the first day of spring but it’s still cold outside.

9. Lena Dunham – I don’t know where you came from but go back there.

8. People who say they have no time to do x,y, or z – You’re not that important and neither is your life or anyone around you. So, ease up and eat a cinnamon scone from time to time.

7. PETA – Animals are going to die in crappy ways and so are humans. Let’s move on.

6. Vanity License Plates – See explanation for # 8

5. Turbulence – Come on science. Can’t you simply tell the plane when it is coming and gear up the shocks. That shit scares the bejesus out of us.

4. Dave Grohl – This upsets me but if we’re being honest….it’s true. Mark my words, in time we will all will be sick of him.

3. SXSW – This is what’s wrong with humans in general…we can’t leave well enough alone. At it’s inception it was a nice little music festival that showcased some new bands. Now it’s basically an industry complete with a massive tech conference the week before with shitbrain wanna be entrepreneurs running around like they just spilled hot coffee on their khakis.

2. Jimmy Fallon – Am I wrong or was he just never funny? In a few ways replacing Jay Leno with him seems so appropriate. Both were never, ever funny and kind of have this sniveling demeanor which, evidently, people find endearing.  Why not  just pair up Jimmy and Lena and send them on a never ending comedy tour to North Korea as a gesture of international relations?

1. Police Ticketing Quotas – If you need to meet a goal by creating a problem then you are the problem.

- who has written 512 posts on The Shade.

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