Sexy Memoirs

Chapter 7: Case of the Withering Azaleas

0 Comments 14 February 2015

Roses and Valentine’s day are like fried chicken and MLK day.  You need them to make the holiday complete and because of that your gonna pay a premium.

But this year I was not giving into the over priced clique just to get my valentine to ride my baloney pony. To avoid the crowds at the flower stores and needing to rack up my gas rewards I went to the local Stop & Shop to see what alternatives were available.

Even there the shelves had been scavenged like the 4th season of The Walking Dead, but in the back of the case was a lowly pot of azaleas.  The price was right, the color combinations were dynamite and as long as I gave it enough water, these things would be withering no more. So I make the purchase and continue onto the most essential need of V day, alcohol.

Dinner cooked, all 4 ice trays filled, and Pandora set to the Keith Sweat station nothing left to do but pop my horny goat weed pill to offset that bottle of Macallan I drank in anticipation of tonight’s events.  I walk over to the medicine cabinet and grab the bottle – it’s light and as I take the cap off I realize it’s empty and as I sulk in the magnitude of my mistake she walks through the front door pronouncing…”Happy Valentine’s day!  Oh are these flowers for me?”

- who has written 512 posts on The Shade.

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